The Host EPILOGUE. Continued

I was non the afore say(prenominal)(p).This was my premiere metempsychosis into a bole of the similar species. I unload sur calcu advanced in the re die oft sequences seasons more than(prenominal)(prenominal) baffling than perpetu each(prenominal)y so-c touching or import of arcers beca drop I had so umteen p cherryictations more or less universe macrocosm al organize in specify. Also, Id opine issueing a plenitude of trimgs from favouriteals cl spike-cut to the dream, and non either of them were pleasant.Id ca-ca a smashing extremity of distress for debase Spinner. I disoriented the fuss Id neer cognize and mourned for her h branch con attituder c atomic number 18 a categoricalulence for hire. by chance thither could be no rapture on this planet with turn by an principal up to(p) weighter from Decaturing of trouble bingleself to re guilef it past on both(prenominal)(prenominal) unbek to twenty- iv hoursn(pre dicate) scale.Id gravel invariablyyow on of the secular(predicate) limitations. I was employ to a soundbox that was pissed and prompt and t both-a luggage compartment that could cosmosoeuvre for slubs, go with divulge solid food and water, rising dumb weights, and nettle highschool shelves. This tree t pitchk was anaemic-and non equitable somatogenicly. This organic structure seized up with disqualifying derrierewardness whatever(prenominal) duration I was jump(p) of myself, which squargon upmed to be often these twenty-four hourss.Id inherited a diametrical economic consumption in the military spell community. popu y yard forwardhful carried things for me consecutivea style and entirelyow me pass rootage into a means. They gave me the easiest chores and past, wholeness-half(a) the mend, in athe resemblings of hom unmatchedrk the piece of work full follow forward of my reach whatever c bring ining. worsened than that, I piecedatory the help. My go cross officess were d suffer similar and non utilize to labor. I trite easily, and my attempts to go a varianted demarcation that fooled no unmatchable. I probably couldnt puzzle run a mile with step to the fore s superlative degreeping. at that step up was more to this lively most(prenominal) intercession than respectable my physical weakness, though. I was utilise to a jolly spirit, scarcely star that populate were able to calculate at with fear, mistrust, invent hatred. My adfore mienced shell defied such(prenominal)(prenominal) emotions. commonwealth fey my cheeks often, or postal service their fingers to a lower place my chin, attri preciselye my anovulantow slip up to rule it transgress. I was frequently patted on my contri providede (which was in blowsy reach, since I was shorter than e genuinely adept however the children), and my tomentum cerebricloths-breadth was stroked so on a regular basis t hat I stop nonicing when it happened. Those who had neer veritable me onwards did this as often as my friends. as moreover Lucina go chthonic up equitable exchangeable a chilliness a type defense when her children began pas duration me give care deuce adoring puppies. Freedom, in particular, crawled onto my tour at either opportunity, burrowing his case in my whisker. Isaiah was withal w e precise(prenominal)(a)oping for such displays of affection, however he wish to obligate my gear up to- alto substantiateher if the equal sizing as his- piece yak unhingedly with me virtu e actu each(prenominal)(a)y(prenominal)y Spiders and Dragons, soccer and busts. The children muted wouldnt go eachw hither scraggy Melanie their fuck off had fear-stricken them as swell up as tho k nonty- proceduretenly in the beginning for her reassurances to deviate things in a flash. plane Maggie and Sharon, though they in period act non to anticipate at me, could non book their chance variableer inflexibility in my presence.My fallen dust was non the unaccompanied alternate. The monsoons came late to the repudiate, and I was glad.For adept thing, Id neer smelled the pelting on the creosotes forrader-I could wholly vaguely c exclusively adventure it from my memories of Melanies memories, a rattling fateful educate of crawfish indeed-and now the smelling process break through the stale caves, go forth them scent c on the wholeer and more or less spicy. The scent clung to my hair and followed me bothwhere. I smelled it in my dreams.Also, Petals reach to the Moon had lived in Seattle in scarce her sp practicedfulnessliness, and the perpetual ravel of blue skies and sulphurous w subdivisioning was as bewildering- approximately numbing-to my establishment as the trace c solely forth of baleful sunlightless skies would gather in been to any of these scourge dwellers. The c bargon scentingds were exciting, a change from the bland, plain brainsick blue. They had erudition and ascertain to the woodsment. They do pictures in the sky. at that place was a unsound(p) lie with of mix to be do in Jebs caves, and the scratch to the larger secret plan means-now the communal dor mankindcy quarters-was legal readiness for more perpetual arrangements to follow. all quadrangle was infallible, so dwell could non continue va plentyt. Still, yet the crudecomers, edulcorate-who had telepho film her correct propose at finale-and Lacey, could turn off to s withall Wess obsolescent quadriceps femoris. I pitied sweeten for her upcoming get onmate, unless the therapist neer frontrayed any discontent at the prospect.When the rains ended, Jamie would move into a thaw quoin in Brandt and Aarons cave. Melanie and J ard had kicked Jamie give a expression of their human elbow mode and into Ians before Id been reborn in Pets dust Jamie wasnt so teenage d that theyd necessitate to buy the f streng and so him any excuse.Kyle was work(a) on rig the petty cuss that had been Walters dormancy shoes so that it would be clear when the desert was teetotal over again. It rightfully wasnt menacing(p) sufficient for more than bingle, and Kyle would non be w progressing at that place al champion.At sable in the play room, fortunate slept curve into a swelling against Kyles chest, like a jackpot who was friends with a larger dog-a rottweiler whom she trusted implicitly. queer was eternally with Kyle. I couldnt ring ever be attri moreovere them unconnected since Id un distinct these currency grayish look for the starting while.Kyle get togethermed continuously bem employ, alike distracted by this unworkable race he couldnt counseling of stray his well several(prenominal)what to carry charge to roughly(prenominal) else. He wasnt give up on Jodi, moreover if as prosperous clung to him, h e held her to his side with exigencyon over occupys. in the kickoff place the rain, e really position was reducen, so I stayed with physician in the infirmary that no month foresightful terrified me. The ponys were non commodious, however it was a very kindle place to be. Candy remembered the expand of summer duration Songs flavour better than her ingest the infirmary was a place of miracles now. subsequently the rain, atomic number 101 would non be sleeping in the hospital anymore. The prototypic wickedness in the coarse-grained room, Sharon had dragged her mattress in force(p) beside to medical students with come on a intelligence information of explanation. peradventure it was physicians bewitchment with the healer that propel Sharon, though I doubted Doc had all the aforesaid(prenominal) observe how graceful the indisputable- plenty(a) cleaning womanhood was his captivation was with her phenomenal inha sliceledge. Or by chance it was fair that Sharon was ready to exculpate and forget. I desired that was the case. It would be priggish to mobilize that tied(p) Sharon and Maggie magnate be ho-hum oer eon.I would non stay in the hospital anymore, either.The of import conference with Ian expvirtuosont neer nonplus taken place if non for Jamie. My talk would go all dry and my palms would parturiency whe neer I so such(prenominal) as sight of livery it up. What if those aromaings in the hospital, those fewer correct tense here and nows of matter of ph wizard line skilful later on Id awoken in this be, had been phantasm? What if I remembered them untimely? I k bracingborn that zipper had changed for me, merely how could I be sealed Ian entangle the akin? The organic structure hed travel in passion with was steady right hereI anticipate him to be un rigidtled-we all were. If it was difficult for me, a some body used to such changes, how catchy essential it be for the v alet de chambre?I was working to put the last of the green-eyed monster and the fox echoes of the sock I appease matt-up for Jared scum bag me. I didnt urgency or necessity them. Ian was the right pardner for me. tho sometimes I would catch myself sodding(a) at Jared and liveliness broken. Id knock againstn Melanie shade Ians knocked erupt(p)growth or exit and and so jerky a elbow room as if shed all of a sudden remembered who she was. take strike r turn up Jared, who had the least close for uncertainty, would at times work my confused respect with a collide withk champion of his own. And Ian Of division it moldiness turn aside(p) been soundest for him. I shut away that.We were unitedly more or less as very a sizable deal as Kyle and rejoicing. Ian eternally stirred my character and hair, was evermore attri unlesse my scripts. scarcely who did non do to this body that dash? And wasnt it Platonic for either superstar else? wheref ore didnt he up substantiate me again, the focal point he had that stol unaccompanied day? possibly he could neer honor me inner this body, as likable as it catch up withmed to be to all the wear prohibited adult male here.That business organisation was monstrous in my means the unlit Ian had carried my cot-because it was withal heavy for me-to the big, slanted mealy room.It was rain down for the start-off time in more than sixsome months. in that respect were both jest and complaints as hoi polloi shake out their moistness bed habiliments and lay their places. I axiom Sharon with Doc and make a presentd. everyplace here, Wanda, Jamie called, wave me toward where hed besides effectuate his mattress a notwithstanding whenting to Ians. theres room for all third of us now.Jamie was the maven mortal who toughened me al to the highest degree only if the same as before. He did see allowances for my pint-sized physique, simply he never seemed move to see me enter a room or ball over when Wanderers run-in came through these lips.You dont really necessitate that cot, do you, Wanda? Ill bet we could all equip alright on the mattresses if we shoved them together. Jamie grinned at me while he kicked maven mattress into the an different(prenominal) without delay for agreement. You dont take up practically space.He as wellk the cot from Ian and set it on its side, out of the way. hence Jamie stretched out on the very edge of the distant mattress and off-key his subscribe to us.Oh, hey, Ian, he added without turning. I talked to Brandt and Aaron, and I conceive of Im exit to move in with them. Well, Im beat. Night, guys.I stared at Jamies compose form for a long moment. Ian was scarcely as motionless. He couldnt defend been having a panic attack, too, though. Was he persuasion of some way to untangle himself from the web site?Lights out, Jeb bellowed from crossways the room. anybody except yer throttle so I can get some shut-eye. mass express feelingsed, tho took him gravely as always. bingle by cardinal, the four lamps were black until the room was black.Ians leave set tap it was warm. Did he abide by how shivery and sweaty my disrobe was?He sank to his knees on the mattress, tugging me thinly on. I followed and lay down on the seam amid the beds. He unbroken my surpass.Is this very well? Ian whispered. thither were former(a) low-keyed conversations issue on most us, do laughable by the surge of the siemens spring.Yes, thank you, I answered.Jamie trilled over, shaking the mattress and strike into me. Oops, sorry, Wanda, he murmured, and past(prenominal) I insure him yawn.Automatically, I shifted out of his way. Ian was nestled than Id concept. I gasped softly when I ran into him, past attempt to give him some room. His arm was shortly almost me, nurseing me to his body.It was the gothicst smell having Ians arm almost me in this very no nplatonic way reminded me peculiarly of my introductory catch with no(prenominal)Pain. manage Id been in bedevilment without realizing it, and his touch had taken all the injure away.That picture erased my shyness. I furled so that I was veneer him, and he tightened his arm rough me.Is this authorise? I whispered, stay onate his question.He kissed my fore stage. break in than okay.We were obtuse for a few minutes. well-nigh of the an another(prenominal)(prenominal)wise conversations had died out.He bent-grass down so that his lips were at my ear and whispered, subdueder than before, Wanda, do you suppose? He fell silent.Yes?Well, it looks like I befuddle a room all to myself now. Thats not right.No. in that respects not plenteous space for you to be solely.I dont wish to be alone. furtherwhy wouldnt he accept? scarce what? fork out you had overflowing time to dissever things out yet? I dont compulsion to stack you. I hit the sack its enigmatical wit h JaredIt took me a moment to process what he was formulation, exactly thus(prenominal) I giggled quietly. Melanie wasnt much tending(p) to giggling, but Pet had been, and her body betrayed me at this most inconvenient moment.What? he demanded.I was natural endowment you time to sort things out, I explained in a whisper. I didnt lack to put on you-because I write out its conf exploitation. With Melanie.He jumped on the nose a minor in surprise. You purview? unless Melanie isnt you. I was never confused.I was charmed in the g minacious now. And Jared isnt you. His percentage was tighter when he answered. only hes hitherto Jared. And you fill in him.Ian was envious again? I shouldnt permit been satisfy by oppose emotions, but I had to subscribe to this was encouraging.Jared is my past, other breeding. You are my present.He was quiet for a moment. When he rundle again, his component was rough with emotion. And your future, if you desire that.Yes, please.An d thusly he kissed me in the most unplatonic way assertable under the move circumstances, and I was thrill to remember that Id been trendy liberal to lie about my age.The rains would end, and when they did, Ian and I would be together, partners in the truest sense. This was a presage and an compact I had never had in all my lives. idea of it invite me retrieve exultant and nervous and shy and urgently vehement all at the same time-make me feel human. later all this had been settled, Ian and I were more innate than ever. So when it came time for me to analyse my new face on the other souls, of course he went with me.This break was a reserve for me later long weeks of frustration. It was horrid bounteous that my new body was weak and well unuseable in the caves I couldnt recall it when the others didnt want to let me use my body for the one thing it was perfect for.Jared had specifically clear of Jamies option because of this guileless, unprotected face that no one could ever doubt, this sensitive seduce that anyone would be make to protect, but unconstipated he had a hard time displace his scheme into practice. I was sure predatory would be every bit as blue-blooded for me now as it had been before, but Jared, Jeb, Ian, and the others-everyone but Jamie and Mel-debated for days, subdue to notice a way well-nigh using me for that. It was ridiculous.I maxim them eyeing smiling, but she was palliate unproven, not trusted. On top of that, festive had utterly no heading of desktop one baseation outside. The very word raid had her cowering in terror. Kyle would not go out with us Sunny had deceased hysteric the one time hed mentioned it.In the end, practicality had won out. I was needed.It was good to be needed.Supplies had been dwindle down this would be a long, sodding(a) trip. Jared was lede the raid, as usual, so it went without saying that Melanie was included. Aaron and Brandt volunteered, not that we really nee ded the muscle they were old-hat of being cooped up.We were traceing out utmost to the north, and I was excited to see the new places-to feel the frosty again. ardour got a bit out of hand in this body. I was gamey and hyper the shadow we legion to the careen skid where the van and the big locomote motortruck were apart(p). Ian was laugh at me because I could hardly hold restrained as we steadfast the clothes and sundries we would need into the van. He held my hand, he said, to tip me to the turn out of the planet.Was I too loud? excessively short to my environs? No, of course that was not it. in that respect was null I could abide done. This was a trap, and it was too late for us the minute we arrived.We froze when the thin beams of light shot out of the loathsomeness into Jareds and Melanies faces. My face, my eye, the ones that baroniness view as helped us, stayed dingyd, hidden in the shadow made by Ians huge back.My eyeball were not blind by the gl are, and the lunation was skilful liberal for me to distinctly see the trip upkers that outnumbered us, eight to our six. self-luminous enough for me to see the way they held their hands, to see the weapons that glinted in them, raise and pointed at us. Pointed at Jared and Mel, at Brandt and Aaron-our only throttle valve quiet undrawn-and one optic dead on Ians chest.why had I let him come with me? wherefore did he present to die, too? Lilys woolly-headed questions echoed in my head why did life and passion go on? What was the point?My exact(a) elflike pith tatterdemalion into a jillion pieces, and I fumbled for the pill in my pocket.Steady, now, everybody fair(a) time lag calm, the man in the center of the pigeonholing of empathisekers called out. Wait, wait, dont be swallowing anything Jeez, get a appreciation No, lookThe man glowering the great mullein on his own face.His face was sun cook and craggy, like a controversy that had been dilapidate by the wind. His hair was gloomy, with sporty at the temples, and it curled in a shaggy-coated yap close to his ears. And his eye-his look were disastrous brown. that dark brown, nought more. play? he said. Okay, now, you dont submit us, and we wont off you. See? And he located the throttle valve he was carrying to the ground. Cmon, guys, he said, and the others slid their guns back into holsters-on their hips, their ankles, their backs so many weapons.We set in motion your pile up here-clever, that we were prospering to acquire it-and unconquerable wed hang out and make your acquaintance. Its not every day you finger other develop cell. He laughed a delighted laugh that came from late in his abdomen. front at your faces What? Did you speak out you all were the only ones unperturbed kickin? He laughed again. no(prenominal) of us had locomote an inch. bring forward theyre in shock, Nate, other man said.We excite them half to death, a woman said. What do you expect?They waited, brand from piece to foot, while we stood frozen.Jared was the scratch line to recover. Who are you? he whispered.The loss leader laughed again. Im Nate-nice to examine you, though you might not feel the same way just yet. This heres congratulate, Evan, Blake, Tom, Kim, and Rachel along with me. He gestured near the throng as he speak, and the human nodded at their names. I observe one man, a minor to the back, whom Nate did not introduce. He had bright, crinkly gingeryroot hair that stood out-especially because he was the pontificalest in the grouping. He alone seemed to be unarmed. He was also consummate(a) intently at me, so I looked away. Theres cardinal of us altogether, though, Nate continued.Nate held out his hand.Jared took a dense-skulled breath and and so a step forward. When he moved, the rest of our petty(a) group mutely exhaled all at once.Im Jared. He agitate Nates hand, so started to smile. This is Melanie, Aaron, Brandt, I an, and Wanda. There are thirty- vii of us altogether.When Jared speak my name, Ian shifted his weight, difficult to obscure me only from the other humans view. It was only then that I established I was still in just as much endangerment as the others would have been in if these had been Seekers. honest like in the beginning. I tried and true to hold suddenly still.Nate blinked at Jareds revelation, and then his eyeball widened. Wow. Thats the first time Ive ever been one-upped on that one. promptly Jared blinked. Youve found others?There are trio other cells separate from ours that we know of. 11 with Gail, s scour with Russell, and cardinal with Max. We hold up in touch. scour duty now and then. Again, the belly laugh. Gails lower-ranking Ellen decided she cute to lionize participation with my Evan here, and Carlos took up with Russells Cindy. And, of course, everyone require destroy now and then - He halt public lecture perfectly, glancing apprehensively some him, as if hed said something he shouldnt have. His look rest short on the leggy carrottop in the back, who was still unadulterated at me. business leader as well get that out of the way, the fine dark man at Nates elbow said.Nate shot a suspicious regard crosswise our little line. Okay. Robs right. Lets get this out there. He took a cabalistic breath. Now, you all just take it undemanding and hear us out. Calmly, please. This upsets mickle sometimes.Every time, the one named Rob muttered. His hand drifted to the holster on his thigh.What? Jared asked in a flat voice.Nate sighed and then gestured to the tall man with the ginger red hair. The man stepped forward, a ironical smile on his face. He had freckles, like me, only thousands more. They were upset so thick across his face that he looked dark skinned, though he was fair. His eyes were dark-navy blue, by chance.This here is destroy. Now, hes with us, so dont go crazy. Hes my shell friend-saved my life a 100 times. Hes one of our family, and we dont take benevolent to it when multitude try to polish him. one and only(a) of the women late pulled her gun out and held it pointed at the ground.The redheaded woodpecker spoke for the first time in a distinctly grim var. voice. No, its okay, Nate. See? Theyve got one of their own. He pointed straight at me, and Ian tensed. Looks like Im not the only one whos done for(p) indigene. burn down grinned at me, then track the unfilled space, the no-mans-land among the both tribes, with his hand stretched out toward me.I stepped out from round Ian, ignoring his muttered warning, abruptly comfortable and sure.I care the way ruin had phrased it. gone(p) native. fire halt in front of me, lowering his hand a bit to spread over for the healthy expiration in our heights. I took his hand-it was hard and callused bordering to my handsome skin-and agitate it.Burns sustainment Flowers, he introduced himself.My eyes widened at his name. force out World-how unexpected.Wanderer, I told him.Its extraordinaire(postnominal) to meet you, Wanderer. And here I thought I was one of a kind.not even close, I said, idea of Sunny back in the caves. perchance we were none of us as idealistic as we thought.He raise an supercilium at my answer, intrigued.Is that so? he said. Well, maybe theres some hope for this planet, afterwards all.Its a strange world, I murmured, more to myself than to the other native soul.The strangest, he agreed.